“Someone took a laser to her chompin’ stones and done fixed ‘em up. Either that or she got dentures.”
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Category Archives: Sass
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
“We’ve all had our own experiences. I worked in a singing diner, you were a French poodle.”
Friday, January 15, 2010
“No one can be intimidating if they’re wearing a skinny piano tie.”
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
“If your parents named you Britney, chances are they knew you had no chance of joining MENSA.”
Tomarra, on baby names
Sunday, December 13, 2009
“Thank you, but I don’t need to be lectured by a naked torso.”
Saturday, December 12, 2009
“Hey! You two! Stop it! No factorials, exponents or fractions in the gay bar!”
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Ryan: We always learned in music class that the organ was the king of the instruments.
Chris: That’s appropriate since it’s always played by a big queen.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
“I think the Darwinosaurus got him.”
Eric Dietrich on a 6-year-boy that ostensibly commandeered a helium weather balloon and then vanished
Thursday, October 8, 2009
“You so should have pumpkin spiced her ass.”
Todd Wachsman
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Tomarra: Ugh, my headache is back…
[T walks by]
Tomarra: T, it’s your fault my headache is back!
T: Wha?
Tomarra: Oh, I’m blaming you for things you have no control over!
T: Hey, that’s what being a husband and father is all about!
Saturday, September 19, 2009
“This is the straightest gay party I’ve ever been to.”
Friday, August 14, 2009
“[The Manhattan JCPenney store] has the most obese mannequins I have ever seen. They probably need special insulin-based epoxy injections just to make their limbs stay on. It’s like a headless wax museum devoted entirely to the cast of ‘Roseanne.’”
The New York Times review of the JCPenney location in Herald Square