Things We Heard (or Said) » Ineptitude & Incompetence

Ryan — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 14:22:00 +0000

“A sand horse! The car of the desert!”
Homer Simpson, upon seeing a camel

Ryan — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 04:43:47 +0000

“A gorilla doing sign language is plausible, but a gorilla maintaining a website is just shocking.”

Ryan — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 00:22:43 +0000

“I really don’t like this new hand sanitizer. It tastes disgusting.”

Ryan — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 04:23:44 +0000

“…and there you have our little chicken corn witch face.”
Martha Stewart

William — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 06:42:38 +0000

“The Europeans brought small pots to the Native Americans.”
A sentence in an intro-level college history student’s essay.

Ryan — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 05:52:15 +0000

“…I guess [that] means that my friends see me as a fashion- and hair-challenged middle-aged woman who says nonsensical words and strangles herself with a phone.”
The only logical explanation for why Gale Beggy reminds people of me

Ryan — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 06:04:51 +0000

“I woke up thinking that we could make billions by charging a tax on dolls.”

William — Wed, 13 May 2009 05:36:23 +0000

“What are we watching?”
“We’re watching ‘If the Earth Were Dead’ or something.”
William Veazey & Ryan Eanes

Ryan — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 06:11:23 +0000

“The boy is about as straight as my elbow, which I am currently holding at a 90º angle to demonstrate how not straight he–oh, never mind.”

Ryan — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 23:48:50 +0000

“I’m relatively normal compared to Japanese people.”
William Veazey

William — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 20:26:33 +0000

“Why is there a giant chocolate-chip cookie up there? Oh, wait, that’s a map of the world.”
Amanda Veazey

William — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 23:46:45 +0000

“[We have] Polok fish….”
An employee of K&W Cafeteria, confusing a racial slur for pollock, a type of fish.