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“Do you all know of any undiscovered ruins?”
“Why are the ruins so close to the road?”
Questions asked of Arizona park rangers

“You can’t ask for too much, because then he’ll be gay.”
Ashley Miller, discussing men

“I used to think I didn’t have eyebrows when I was little.”
My sister Amanda

“Hey, I didn’t know there was corn in cornbread!”
Tara Holt, upon finding kernels of corn in a piece of cornbread

“Please, God, help me with my Religion.”
Ashley, praying for academic intervention

“With the exception of the Duke fans, everyone seems to be in favor of Arizona.”
commentator on the Duke/Arizona game

“Lobsters don’t have crust on ’em!”
Inept woman on The Newlywed Game who didn’t know what her husband’s favorite crustacean was